Thursday, 17 March 2011


My most recent post was brief, miserable and distinctly hostile in tone.  For the latter, I apologise.

Having said that, the fact remains that Birthdays with a capital B are really not for me.  Not that it is possible to avoid/evade them, but simply that they do not rank high on my list of 'occasions'.

Trying to work out just why that is has brought me back full circle to where I started.

It is not that I fear ageing, to do so would be totally pointless.  We all, if we are lucky, age. 

It is not that getting older is a cause for regret, except in as much as, given my time again i would do things differently, that is if I also had the gift of 20/20 vision and could make a whole fresh pile of errors, messes, and occasional right decisions.

No, it seems to me, that those who do "over-the-top" celebrations of what is unavoidable, inevitable and a non-event in itself, have the feeling that if the day is not marked by something spectacular, they will become in some way invisible.

My evening out with the girls (not my idea), was very enjoyable, but in the same pub there was a table of a dozen or so very loud birthday celebrants, all seemingly intent on outdoing each other in terms of decibel levels and generally fairly rowdy behaviour.  Oddly enough, what was not clear, was whose birthday it actually was.

So, are birthdays for the celebrant or just an excuse/reason for a 'party'?

Nothing wrong with that but why make the fact that someone is one year further down the 'slippery slope' the cause of such OTT rejoicing?

Can someone, anyone, explain what for me is a total mystery?


  1. Don't you talk to me about birthdays, mate! My husband died on my birthday, my mother went into terminal decline on her own birthday and died the day after, my first husband went into terminal decline on our eldest son's birthday and departed the day after, even the cat picked someone's birthday to shuffle it off.

    So I know what I'll be celebrating on my birthday - survival, mate, that's what!

  2. I'm truly sorry about your catalogue of woes/coincidences? but have to ask, why is survival such a great thing?
    Quality not quantity is my preference, and if that offends, I'm sorry.
    I too have a list of clashing dates to remember!
    That said, I wouldn't willingly choose Alzheimers, despite its one obvious advantage.

  3. I upset my family by choosing to do just what I wanted on my birthday last Sunday. I declined invitations out for lunch. I didnt accompany spouse to church, but listened to the Archers omnibus. I heated up some casserole for Sunday lunch, bought cake from Farm shop and sat in the chair and read the papers for most of day until family and small boys arrived. I said no presents , there is nothing I want ,only booktokens.
    Knowing friends and family want to please you is enough for me.
    I am going to start listening to music again after reading your blog.

  4. Margaret. Not sure whether the listening to music is good or bad, but I like the sound of your birthday of choice, particularly the Archers omnibus. Until I joined the choir in St. M's and therefore have to be there for every sung service, I used to listen to it too - for about 30 years actually - so can well understand your pleasure.
    I love receiving cards but for the rest, I can well do without any reminders.

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  6. Hi Ray, Sorry I made a mistake on my 1st comment and had to delete it :-(

    I agree with you that B-day parties and most other celebrations nowadays are over the top. Keep it simple is my model about B-day parties and most everything else in life.


  7. Hi Ron
    With you all the way. Thanks for the visit.