Thursday, 25 February 2021

How Bizarre


One of the more interesting affects of the year-long isolation since Covid struck has, for me, been the change in my deaming habits.

A life-long insomniac used to sleeping in short snatches, often filled with quite odd dreams, this last year has made an unexpected impact on my sleeping patterns.

On several occasions recently I have half-woken and found myself laughing hysterically at something I found so funny that I would get up and still only half awake write down what I had heard. 

In the morning fully awake there would be a scribbled half joke which didn't even raise a smile.

A few days ago I once again woke up but this time I remembered the entire joke/funny story complete with all the punctuation. 

I got up and wrote it out in full, exactly as it was heard, or dictated or read to me.

The next  morning I got up full of anticipation and this is what I read

Customs officer to old lady immigrant

"Are you carrying any firearms madam?"

Old lady "Yes of course I am"

Customs offical

What weapons are you carrying?"

Old lady "10 Kalashnikovs and a water pistol"

Customs offical

What is the water pistol for?"

Old lady "To drown anyone who tries to steal my Kalashnikovs"

As jokes go, I think it could be described as 'alternative', but I still find it funny and wonder just where it came from.

I await the next one with interest.





3 comments:

  1. How weird. I enjoyed your joke and it gave me a laugh. I just read your "about me" and see you have been diagnosed with Parkinson's Disease and you mention your singing. My husband and I organise walks for people with PD here in Whangarei, New Zealand and one of the other things available is a singing class to help with speech so your singing will be of great benefit as I am sure you know.

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  2. Hi Susan. Yes I do know the value of singing but of course have not sung a note since March 15th last year.
    In fact I only speak to someone face-to-face omce a week when a neighbour takes me shopping, or the odd phone call.
    I've had the 1st dose of the vaccine so at least there is now an end in sight to the awful isolation. Whether it will include singing is debateable, since the speaking voice will have to be 'oiled' before anything more ambitious.
    As for the strange joke, one thing extra occured to me on reading it again and that was the customs officer only asking what the water pistol was for. No mention of the Kalashnikovs!

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