Wednesday, 20 April 2011

Colour it Purple

Memories, particularly those which are painfull, for me appear in colour.

No I don't mean I see pictures in a coloured bubble, but, depending on the nature of the reflection it assumes a 'tone'.  Maybe pink (rare), yellow (even more rare), green, grey, or purple.

Yesterday in mid-day communion an often repeated prayer suddenly took on new meaning for me.  It was in the intercessionary prayers where those people who have recently lost someone or whose "anniversay" falls at about this time.

It occurred to me that for me, at least, anniversaries are not about specific dates, marriage, birthday, death, but more events in daily life, the first time we did so and so, went to such and such a place.  Revisiting somewhere which had made a big impact for some reason.  A piece of music.  Even a tree peony blooming for the first time, the year after my husband's death.  He never saw it bloom.  Huge purple memory.

No two people think, remember, reflect on things in precisely the same way, but the number of times I have seen people, male and female alike, in and around the church with unexplained tears for no apparent reason convinces me that memories can be triggered by almost anything.

This in a way folows on from the last blog I posted, where I mentioned that procedures intended to be therapeutic and healing can in fact produce the opposite effect.

If your day is a grey one, it is perhaps not because you are in a 'bad' mood, but may in fact be because some small sound, sight, comment, have awakend thoughts which are still only half recognized.  If you smile a small private smile at something you have remembered which caused pleasure at the time, it really is not because you need locking up, but just that memories can turn your day pink.

On the other hand, if like me, you are a glass-half-empty type the prevailing shade in your daily spectrum is likely to be purple.

5 comments:

  1. Spot on, Ray. Memories can colour everything, often without us realising it. Certainly memories, whether sad or happy, can be triggered almost out of nowhere. I can remember walking down a shopping street with tears rolling down my face when something suddenly reminded me of my mother who had died some time before.

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  2. The rainbow exists for everybody (not to sure about over it though) the fullest expression of experience and emotion. If a non invasive method of therapy or meditaion is used it often will not affer peace but sometimes painful self examination and new realisations, that enables consciouse deliberation and even resolution of semi or fully repressed memories and emotions.RX

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  3. Thanks both.
    On reflection, I think perhaps just allowing the odd twinge and tweak of memory a brief influence on our day is better than concsiously dwelling at length on the past.
    It would not be very wise to walk through life with our heads turned over our shoulders.
    Nevertheless, colour my days they still will.

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  4. My memories are rainbow-coloured too - but a bit hazy and grey today. We all need space to come to terms with what is in our minds.

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  5. True Freda, though I think my mind has rather more space than content these days.

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