Loss in a pandemic

Since Lockdown began I have counted 8 deaths of people I knew, starting with a 14 year old girl, a member of our church, and culminating last Friday with the loss of my eldest brother.

None of these deaths were officially due to Covid 19, but i cannot help but wonder whether one of the hidden affects of the virus is loss of energy, vitality and optimism, and  whether these can actually cause a death.

The fact that none of these people no matter how greatly they were loved will receive the sort of send-off they deserved, and which we would love to give them makes the loss much more keenly felt,

Many of us are still not venturing out or taking public transport anywhere, never mind the considerable distances involved for many who have lost friends or relatives.

What kind of long-term affect this  may have on us is not yet known, but I can't help but feel that the grieving process will take a very different form than it would have done pre Covid.

Prayer and lighting candles in our own homes (in my case alone), will only go so far to easing the sadness we feel, with no chance to share the family or friends group of fellow mourners we would normally use as a crutch.

Let's hope and pray that an end to this awful period of our history will come soon.

Scared - Who Me?

Today I ventured out (thanks to my neighbour who gave me a lift), for the first time since 18th March,

To say I was scared stiff is the understatement to beat all understatements, I was terrified!

The mask I was wearing was slowly roasting me and my hands were sweating in the gloves but that was nothing to  my heart rate which was super fast.

Once in the supermarket I was just so intent on the actual shopping that I forgot to be nervous and luckily as it was 4.30pm there were very few people in there, which made it much easier.

It was becoming apparent that if I didn't make the effort to go out I was soon going to be unable to do so, and I'm so glad I did.

If anyone had told me what a terrifying prospect going food shopping would be  back in February I 'd have laughed at the idea.

The huge  change of mind this pandemic has brought about in so many people is astonishing.

One small step for woman.......